Friday, March 20, 2009

Spring is Here!

All the little new things will be here soon - leaves on the trees, flowers, tiny birds, and new-born lambs. I love the Fall, but Spring is renewal time. For all of us, but especially for those of us who live in the Northern snow belt, this is the energizing season, when all of us are coming up with plans for ourselves - to re-do the living room, get the garden seeded, do some yard sale browsing. For the writer, it's to get the book finished, to get it edited, to get it published, dang it! I am full of optimism and energy. I hope this beautiful season brings you the same joy.

I shot off another query yesterday, to keep my percolating ones to a count of 12. Summary: 12 pending, 5 rejects, 1 partial out there. When I sent off that query yesterday, I mistakenly said I had pasted in 10 chapters (I wish!), instead of the suggested 10 pages, so I quickly sent a correction to them. This morning there was a response, and I thought it was bound to be one of those instant rejects, but it was "No Problem!" Such a generous response! Such an upbeat two words! Such an enthusiastic exclamation mark! Surely I can read something into this... As it's such a lovely day, I believe I will.

Of course, spare cash is always a problem, isn't it, for most of us? I was therefore delighted to receive this email yesterday. A Half-Million Dollars for helping someone out? My goodness, talk about perfect timing!

"Hi Dear,

l saw your profil and go through it and willing to contact you, I have to introduce myself for you, I am Mr.David Komu, the only son of late Chief and Mrs George Komu, I wish to request for your assistance in my efforts to procure the transfer of my inherited funds for investment ventures.

I have Five Million Dollars ($5.000,000.00) here in my name with one of the prime banks here and I will require for your assistance in receiving the transfer of the funds in your local bank account for investment purposes. As it is my desire to come over to your country to further my education
while you take goodcare of the investment, I will be very glad to give you 10% of the total sum for your co-operation.

I will be very appreciative if you can return to me with urgent dispatch to enable me advise you on the modalities.

I am waiting for your immediate response.

My Kind Regards!
Mr.David Komu

Please reply to me with this my private email.
davidkomu002@yahoo.com"


Seriously, I'm amazed that this kind of stuff is still floating around. Do we all come across as total idiots, naive Westerners with no brains to speak of? I think it's that assumption that most offends me. Give me a slick, clever, intuitive con man any day, over the insulting ones.

I was going to suggest that we all, as many as possible, email him back and lead him on, as it were. I found a wonderful English site some years back, where this chap kept up tanatalizing online correspondence with several similar writers for months, representing himself to them as a vicar, a baronet, a professor, and so on. The stuff he posted was some of the funniest I've read. Of course, finally the naughty crooks realized what was happening to them. If I can find the "vicar's" post, I'll put it up sometime.

Take a break from the writing this weekend and go out and enjoy this new season. It's still cold here, but that's just the last of Nature's little jokes. Pretend it's really warm.

POSTSCRIPT: That nice agent just asked for three-chapters!

9 comments:

Michelle H. said...

Wow. I'm surprised they didn't autoreject you with the second letter.

I would have read those words, "No Problem," as "Oh, we were so hoping you would have sent us your full manuscript but we will sadly take the 10 pages knowing we will ask for more later. I can think upbeat too.

Wish those spam letters would stop. I get three daily. I even had one con man try to befriend me on Facebook. So sad.

Melissa Marsh said...

I love spring, too! I can't wait to sit out on my deck with my laptop and write.

Hope you have a gorgeous weekend!

Eric said...

So what are "queries" about anyway? I am completely new to the whole writing gig, so I'm trying to learn how things work. When do you send out queries? Should it be when the book is completely finished?

Embee said...

I'm crossing my fingers for you that after the 10 pages they want the entire manuscript!

I like your idea to spam that dude right back.

It's still cold here in North Dakota by most standards, but at 39F degrees we're breaking out the barbecues! (well, we would if the dang snow would all get melted!)

I'm taking a break from creative writing this weekend to get my academic writing done. Can't wait for this semester to be finished!

Have a great weekend and enjoy the impending spring!

Fran said...

Hey guys, see my postscript re the nice agent...

Embee said...

AWESOME! Congrats....hope they want the whole thing soon!!!

Casey said...

Eric, queries are what you send when you're seeking representation by an literary agent for your novel, and yes, you send them after your novel is finished. Do some Google searching! You'll definitely want to do quite a bit of research before you starting querying.

Good luck on the partial Fran! I get those Spam e-mails too. One of them claimed they had been hired to kill me but if I paid them X amount, they wouldn't do it. That one was sort of creepy, so I reported it to his e-mail service. Otherwise I think they are pretty hilarious and ridiculous.

Fran said...

Casey, I sent Eric a separate comment to his blog advising him to check out the Author! Author! site, because it has ALL the answers he could ever need. (Didn't want you to think I ignored him.)

Janet said...

*sigh* Spring is there, but not here. Admittedly, the snow has dwindled a lot but we're still scraping along below freezing most of the time.