Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Writers Who Don't Write Get Grouchy

I'm still in non-writing mode, trying to convince myself that a writer needs a break from the constant internal conversations of characters who don't exist. Of course, I'm suffering. Writing has become my life. There -- I said it. The day-to-day personal things I do are of no interest to anyone, I'm sure. I quit Facebook and Twitter for exactly that reason. Who would care? I do my daily chores, read a lot, watch more TV than is healthy, considering how irritated I get with it. And my politics, my philosophies, the things that impassion me are revealed only in my work -- deep, deep in the work, I hope. Nothing worse than a preachy novelist.

So I expect to be embroiled in the next book very soon. I can't go on this way. I had a tiny thought that I could do some painting, but my heart just isn't in it. Painting does make me happy, and it's an almost instant fix. You come up with the idea, and get it down on the canvas. But I need more than that. I want total mental immersion day in, day out. I need the pull of my story to get me rushing downstairs to the computer each morning. The painting will have to wait. It's been a long time since the last one and, no doubt, will be a long time until the next.

This blog was meant to be a diary of my writing days. I enjoy talking about the work-in-progress, and sharing the various stages of it, although whether it's ever uplifting and useful to others I'm not sure. The fact is: my blog is a bit pointless if it doesn't talk about the act of writing. Why else would you read it?

And so I am at loose ends. I can't imagine not being a writer. I don't like not writing. Many of you grumble about the inability to write -- from lack of time, or lack of enthusiasm. If it's making you irritable, I understand. I'm about as crabby and sober as I can get, and it has to stop. Booze won't do it.

It's all about to change. I want my other life back. The writing one. I'll let you know how it goes.
"You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you." ~ Ray Bradbury