Friday, March 20, 2009

Spring is Here!

All the little new things will be here soon - leaves on the trees, flowers, tiny birds, and new-born lambs. I love the Fall, but Spring is renewal time. For all of us, but especially for those of us who live in the Northern snow belt, this is the energizing season, when all of us are coming up with plans for ourselves - to re-do the living room, get the garden seeded, do some yard sale browsing. For the writer, it's to get the book finished, to get it edited, to get it published, dang it! I am full of optimism and energy. I hope this beautiful season brings you the same joy.

I shot off another query yesterday, to keep my percolating ones to a count of 12. Summary: 12 pending, 5 rejects, 1 partial out there. When I sent off that query yesterday, I mistakenly said I had pasted in 10 chapters (I wish!), instead of the suggested 10 pages, so I quickly sent a correction to them. This morning there was a response, and I thought it was bound to be one of those instant rejects, but it was "No Problem!" Such a generous response! Such an upbeat two words! Such an enthusiastic exclamation mark! Surely I can read something into this... As it's such a lovely day, I believe I will.

Of course, spare cash is always a problem, isn't it, for most of us? I was therefore delighted to receive this email yesterday. A Half-Million Dollars for helping someone out? My goodness, talk about perfect timing!

"Hi Dear,

l saw your profil and go through it and willing to contact you, I have to introduce myself for you, I am Mr.David Komu, the only son of late Chief and Mrs George Komu, I wish to request for your assistance in my efforts to procure the transfer of my inherited funds for investment ventures.

I have Five Million Dollars ($5.000,000.00) here in my name with one of the prime banks here and I will require for your assistance in receiving the transfer of the funds in your local bank account for investment purposes. As it is my desire to come over to your country to further my education
while you take goodcare of the investment, I will be very glad to give you 10% of the total sum for your co-operation.

I will be very appreciative if you can return to me with urgent dispatch to enable me advise you on the modalities.

I am waiting for your immediate response.

My Kind Regards!
Mr.David Komu

Please reply to me with this my private email."

Seriously, I'm amazed that this kind of stuff is still floating around. Do we all come across as total idiots, naive Westerners with no brains to speak of? I think it's that assumption that most offends me. Give me a slick, clever, intuitive con man any day, over the insulting ones.

I was going to suggest that we all, as many as possible, email him back and lead him on, as it were. I found a wonderful English site some years back, where this chap kept up tanatalizing online correspondence with several similar writers for months, representing himself to them as a vicar, a baronet, a professor, and so on. The stuff he posted was some of the funniest I've read. Of course, finally the naughty crooks realized what was happening to them. If I can find the "vicar's" post, I'll put it up sometime.

Take a break from the writing this weekend and go out and enjoy this new season. It's still cold here, but that's just the last of Nature's little jokes. Pretend it's really warm.

POSTSCRIPT: That nice agent just asked for three-chapters!

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Quotes to Consider

"If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are dead and rotten, Either write things worth reading, or do things worth writing." ~Benjamin Franklin

"Well behaved women rarely make history."~Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

“A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.”~William G.T. Shedd (1820-1894), theologian, teacher, pastor

"It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something." ~Franklin D Roosevelt (1882-1945), 32nd U.S. president

“Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience.”
~Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882), essayist, poet, philosopher

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~Mark Twain

"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take."
~ Wayne Gretzky